Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
We just shotgunned beers for America
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize
