I'm pants shitting drunk right now
That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
Randomize