i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Randomize
