forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
Randomize
