is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize
