I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
Randomize
