i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
Randomize
