If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
he drank half a bottle of bushmills, stood up to pee over the side, pissed his pants, sat in the puddle on the deck, told me my life goals were stupid and impossible, and wouldn't leave until 5am. by the time I got up at 8 I had 4 texts and 2 fb messages from him. AND HE STILL THINKS IT WENT WELL
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
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