You're so nebulous sometimes
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
And then the night went full on bisexual.
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
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