Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
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