Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
did you just send me my own nude
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
Randomize
