I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize
