Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
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