I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize
