Cab driver just said he likes mutual masturbation in the cab. Um
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
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