its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
