Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
I lost the right to judge tonight
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Randomize
