they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
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