i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
No stitches, just platelets and will power
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
Randomize
