If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize