If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
when I woke up the last searched thing on my phone was "how to make a fireproof dress" I need to stop drinking.
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
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