What a fucking waste of an outfit
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
Randomize
