I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
Randomize
