yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
Randomize