i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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