I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
Randomize