You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?
Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
Randomize
