Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
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