He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
Can you please tell me why there's a bottle of urine on my night stand with a note that says "in case you're thirsty in the morning"? Thanks.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize
