5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
do herpes really smell.
My vagina just recognized that song.
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
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