dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
Randomize
