I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
Randomize
