My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize