But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
pop tarts are not kleenex
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
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