I saw his package. It spoke to me.
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
Randomize
