I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
highlight of my day: hitchhiking a ride with random locals. tried to make conversation, asked what they do. driver says "you clearly don't recognize me." turns out i have had sex with him and forgot.
You are officially qualified to graduate from college.
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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