he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
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