I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
She throws back shots like they are NO-THING. I swear, she goes through like five straight tequila shots, does a jello shot, chases with half a hot dog, has a rum and coke, and then takes her shirt off and makes an impromptu bandage out of it for fuckin' Tim who cut himself on the flagpole. I'm going to marry her.
you made out with another girl for some wings
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Randomize
