So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
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