so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
