She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
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