But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
I guess i tried to text 911 last night with "someone stole my bong." Thank god that doesn't work...
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize