He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Randomize
