I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
