so explain again why im purple
no
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
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