also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
We are two peas in an std pod
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize
