he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
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