i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
Randomize