on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
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