Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
Do you have any cake mix? I kind of need to make a "im sorry i drank all your parents tequila, threw up all over your floor and slept with you boyfriend" cake.
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
handjob tips. give me some.
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
Randomize