I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
I force fed him french fries and then proceeded to tell him how sexy corgi’s are … it’s safe to say he’s not texting me for a second date.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
Randomize