This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
So apparently the bar gave out free condoms, which I now have a pocket full of. Why is drunk me shoving the fact that I'm single and not getting laid in sober me's face...
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
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