If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
YAS. BRING CRAB.
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
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